[Candyman1984]

Hey ya'll! I was just wondering if i could get some feedback on this. I am having troubles with chords for a bridge and an idea for a third verse like kill the bitch or something. I don't know that maybe a bit harsh, but you guys catch my drift

Code: Select all

intro
C Bb G

    C Bb   G    G
Now I don't know
    C Bb   G   
But I Been Told
C      Bb   G
You've been out there
Bb   F  G
Messin' Around
    
No What do you
Mistake me for
Just some fool
Out on the town
(Refrain)
    D      C                G
Now baby i think its time you learned
     D         C          G
That Sometimes we all get burned
    D             C          G
And i hope i don't see it all go down
        Bb             F                  G
Because it sure stings when it comes back around 

Now baby you've
Got some type of nerve
Treating me 
The way you do

And I'm not gonna
Take it any more
I think its time
You walked out that door

Refrain

daba daba daba Thangoo

[Candyman1984]

the chords aren't where they are supposed to be, bummer. does anyone know how to change that for future reference

[shakedown_04092]

the chords aren't where they are supposed to be, bummer. does anyone know how to change that for future reference

Use the "code" button above:

Code: Select all

     G
See, it's like this
               A
You press the "code" button, paste your stuff
             D
And press it again to close it up

[Candyman1984]

Shakedown, thanks dude
thats just the way it is supposed to be my man

[nicolasalk]

great!

i like the chord changes

try addin some minor chords

Code: Select all

    D      Bm               G
Now baby i think its time you learned 

just an example

an record it!!, so i can listen it

just my opinion

[strumminsix]

Gotta hear it recorded.

It will either be a passionate masterpiece or have a very cliche-esque two-timing woman blues feel.

I think it will be the prior!

[Candyman1984]

Alright Strummin' and Nicolasalk here it is- the rough version of it at least. I recorded it using imovie so it sounds pretty weak, in addition, its only like the 5th or sixth time i've played the song all the way through to the point were i am at-And i think its shaping up to be a cliche-esque blues tune rather than a passionate masterpiece, but thanks for the vote of confidence. anyhow, i look forward to your criticisms


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WtPI0OOD8P0[/youtube]

[IamDocWatson]

if your taking it the bluesy way try throwing a 7th chord, or alot of em, in there

like a V7

[strumminsix]

Dig it! Nothing like I imagined! Kinda has that 60s Claptonesque blues vibe where the lyrics are bluesy but the chord progressions are major.

Excellent usage of pauses and meter in the vocals.

[d-v-s]

candyman - I like the track a lot. Thanks for posting the video. I had some ideas for your song, but I've never written a song before, so take it for what it's worth.

1. bridge - i'd throw it in right after that second refrain, and try to start it in an Em - Am type movement . Maybe use this to change the tone of the song a little bit, get sentimental, remember the good time with her, then lead back into the verse where you're still leaving her. maybe transition from the bridge back to the verse by playing the verse chords backwards - G Bb C pause C Bb G. then start the next verse.

2. the last verses - i'd make it something about how you're back on the street and you got a new love, or something like that, and she just keep messin' around.

I don't have a guitar with me, so i'm making this up in my head...sorry if it's all rubbish.

[CaptainTrips]

I really liked it. Good work. But adding some flavor to the chords would liven it up a bit, a seventh here or there, maybe even a sixth, maybe some sustains. But the overall feel is the most important and that I dig.

[nicolasalk]

its great, but i insist.

some minor chords, like d-v-s said

[GratefulPat]

ya its much different than i thought it would be, but indeed very good

[BlobWeird]

I liked it. And to be honest its VERY rare that I like amateur music. So thats saying somethin good for you haha. Keep it up. Oh and I agree that you should go minor with the bridge and maybe throw some sevenths in the verse

[Shaggy]

I don't think you need any help! You are doing fine.

I like your style.