Some of my favorite theories:
PostPosted:Sat Jun 30, 2007 12:11 pm
Pretty self-explanitory:
And for one of the all-time best, here's an old one. In one episode of 'Cheers', Cliff is seated at the bar describing the Buffalo Theory to his buddy, Norm. I don't think I've ever heard the concept explained any better than this:
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Makes sense to meTHE GEORGE CARLIN THEORY ON LIFE:
The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A Death. What's that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch and you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities. You become a little baby, you go back into the womb, spend your last nine months floating ... and you finish off as an orgasmAnd for one of the all-time best, here's an old one. In one episode of 'Cheers', Cliff is seated at the bar describing the Buffalo Theory to his buddy, Norm. I don't think I've ever heard the concept explained any better than this:
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Brilliant, Cliff. Simply brilliant.The Buffalo Theory
"Well, you see, Norm, it's like this....A heard of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.
In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Now, as we know, excessive intake of alcohol kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first, thus making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. And that, Norm, is why you always feel smarter after a few beers"
