When it doesn't fit anywhere else
 #23356  by gumbo
 
So here I am, 17 years of me and graduating highschool in 5 months. I have no plans of going to college in the near future, but I have a general plan for geting me there at some point. Plans I learned never work though and I am open to other paths. I do plan on going though. I am worried though because I want to tour. This was the craziest, most revealing summer of my life, haveing been to my first festival. It was like I had filled a void in my life and continued someone elses. Now I am left feeling like nothing else mattered before this. It was that important. Like it was supposed to happen, the people I went with, how I got there, family and the hospitality. I was taken care of from the beginning, from people I had just met. It was just this crazy bond between me and every other person I met, like I was welcomed and wanted. Now I feel left out, out in Babylon with this huge anticipating urge to leave asap, with only email addresses and phone numbers that work after 9. No one in my family supports this. I am always being told how it wont work and how much support I wont be getting from anyone. Me and my family dont have a good relationship. I know I'm on my own in 5 months and thats scary. I also know I would be taken care of and that I would find my place. Am I crazy??? or did I see how things can really happen??, or is there more to this that I'm not seeing??? I just need some reassurance and motivation that I'm not dillusional, and that things like this do exist. Please help me.

 #23359  by razmablues
 
hey man, i'm in the exact same position as you. i'm 18 and i already got into college and what not, but i'm really not too enthused about it, but my family wouldn't support me going off into the country and doing whatever.

i'm in a big pickle

 #23361  by gratephulphish123
 
if the dead or phish were touring i'd be THERE, even sci i might take a bit of time off, but as it is theres noone to tour with and in order to tour you need to be able to sell things people want outside concerts (illegal substances :D) or colorful wallets, if theres a band with cheap enough tickets i'd say go for it man, you only live once, but watch yourself and be absolutely sure you'll be able to make subsistence living if you tour. if you are able to tour i envy you very much :cool:

 #23362  by AugustWest
 
I'm in the group that says go to school. Go to as many shows as you can around campus then when you are done and 21. (which comes quicker than you think) go on tour. Shows are more fun when you don't have to sneak drinks around anyway. Get the degree go have a blast knowing you have something legit to fall back on. I wish I had taken my own advice.

 #23365  by shakedown_04092
 
I have to agree w/ AugustWest....go to school, get it over with. Now is the time to do it. I am 27 and still haven't gone back (went for 1+ year and said forget it, but need to get back).

The life you tasted is sweet, but it's not "real". Eventually, the music/tours stop, and where are you gonna be then? It's supposed to be fun and everything as you described it, but only in doses (no pun intended).

Touring is a hard and somewhat dangerous way to live nowadays. Ultimately, it's a dead end road. That's not to say on your breaks/vacations you can't pack it up and hit the road for a few weeks at a time, but your family loves you, regardless of your relationship with them at the present time, and they only want what's best for you, believe it or not.



And that, my friend, is something to cherish, because not everyone's lucky enough to even have family.

Be glad you do - it's the most important thing in the world.

 #23366  by jackr
 
I am 47 now and consider myself a very very lucky survivor. When I was 17 i did go on tour. Sold acid and coke and made a ton of cash.

I watched many of my friends die, go to jail and institutions and some that just remained fucked up and broke. I was lucky enough that I only got busted (several times) but I came close to dying on several occassions.

Even though I had many good times. Times people write books about, if I had to do it again there would be no fucking way I would. It is too risky.

Maybe things are different 30 years later but it doesnt look like it to me. I vote you should stay in school and grow up. I know it may sound like something your father would say but I have actually been there and done that. Most of my friends that have also been there and done that aren't here anymore.

 #23369  by krzykat
 
I combined the two. went to college but still toured. Made it to every venue on fall and spring tour, and of course summer, graduated with a 3.0 gpa too. I would not change anything i did for the world.

Image

 #23370  by bodiddley
 
I hate to say my parents were right but I kinda wish I listened to them and got a degree that woulda been paid for by them. Pot and good times were more important to me then. I had some great times but really didn't straighten my shit out until I joined the NAVY (something I swore I would never do). Everything worked out ok and now I think back about the NAVY as one of the best freakin' times in my life (yes, I still went to many Dead shows while I served). If you have the oppurtunity to get educated at your parents expense ( or if you have to work part time) I suggest you do so.

My 2 cents

 #23371  by myoung6923
 
Ok - I'm the camp that says - go to college, have fun at festivals and shows when you can - but don't bypass the opportunity to get an education as well as have a great time in school.

I'm another one that wished I would have listened to my own advice - do as I say not as I did - I had to learn the hard way.

I'm 41 and went to lots of shows during high school and thought that I'd discovered a sort of utopia. I was having a great time, seeing great music, making good money (making & selling tye dyes - and anything else that I could...), meeting and hanging with great people. But aside from the many issues that you will run across on the road, from being busted, robbed, broke and down and out in a strange town with not-so-friendly locals and worse - there's a dark underside to this utopia - from within - that's unseen until you're immersed in it. Not everything is as it appears... 'Nuff said - not all that sparkles is gold...

I'm also another one that's a fortunate survivor - not all of my friends can say the same. Some died, some are in jail and some are so tweaked that maybe they'd be better off in jail or something.

At 18 I knew it all - nobody could tell me how to do the right thing. After high school I figured that I never was going to see the inside of any kind of school in my life. I was going to go on tour, make a ton of money, follow the dead out to CA and get a place with friends in Santa Cruz and live happily ever after. Well, I did make it out to CA - broke, living out of the van, rapidly literally starving myself and not at all having the fun that I thought I would. There were roving groups of "kids" that called themselves "trollbusters" (the hippies in the area were called trolls) that were beating robbing raping and eventually killing the hippies living around the beaches in Santa Cruz. After 3 months of living like this I finally succumbed to dysentery, dehydration and severe poison oak over every inch of my body. I was 135 lbs (I'm 6' tall and I was 190 before tour). That's when I finally admitted - ok, maybe I don't know what I'm doing. I was lucky enough to have very loving parents that helped get back on my feet (after a bit of a hospital stay) and helped get into college.

How wrong I was about school - I had a freakin' blast in college - I wish I could go back. More than just the partying and friends - learning became fun - it was fun because it was what I wanted to do - nobody was forcing me to do it. I wish I could have saved myself that first year of being a stupid know it all and just gone straight to school - who knows...

I have a daughter now that's just starting college and a son that will be in a couple of years and this is what I tell them about the subject...

You can work hard in college for the next 4 years and then you can coast for the rest of your life - or, you can coast for the next 4 years and then work hard and struggle constantly for the rest of your life.

Ok - enough preaching - but, try to look ahead down the road, not just at what's immediately in front of you - it pays.

 #23387  by LazyLightnin
 
GO TO SCHOOL, i didnt and im hurtin bad because of it, i'll need a diploma to get any kind of promotion from anyone. i make decent money , but it sure would be nice to be able to save some, buy a house etc..

 #23388  by mutant_dan
 
I have to agree with all the other old timers here.

You really need to find some balance in your life so you can enjoy what is going on in the music scene and what needs to happen in your life to plan for the future.

 #23392  by grateful4booze
 
You should get a job on a roofing crew or doing heavy construction outside in the elements. Do that for 6 months and you'll really appreciate college. If you really don't want to go to school, learn a TRADE. My brother is a plumber and makes a shitload of $$ and is self employed. I own a retail shop which is nice, but you can't take off and leave it.

 #23395  by Shaggy
 
I am what you could call a cynical idealist so keep that in mind, but:

The idea that your life is decided by some test results and a couple of choices made in your late teen years is preposterous and bullshit. So don't let it be the be all and end all.

I have made so many differents twists and about turns in life that I can say this, I've made what other people will call bad choices and f-ups and at other times quite inspired ones. But the whole idea is taking chances, the things you'll regret later will be the things you never did and wished you had.

Education is of huge importance, as much for your own being as it is for a career. But don't be fooled into thinking that the only time is now.

If you are a clear minded and intelligent person which I am sure you are (or else you wouldn't be posting on this site) then you will make the right choice, if years later you look back and say it was wrong, well so what that is life. To quote Wizard from Taxi Driver, "I mean in the end we're all fucked, more or less."

Good luck.

 #23401  by ronster
 
Partying is a lot of fun. However people are not meant to party all of the time. People need a balance in life and to turn away from your family for a hedonstic lifestyle after being forced to go to school for so many years may appear to be the road you want to pursue, but after awhile you will no doubt be feelin' like the guy who wrote this tune
Out on an open highway,
Such a lovely day but something's wrong.
Something, something's gotta be wrong.
Just left home this morning,
This old road keeps rolling on and on.
Rolling, rolling on and on.

Won't somebody help me (somebody help me)
Somebody help me (somebody help me)
Somebody help me (somebody help me)
I've never been so lonesome and a long way from home
I've never been so lonesome and a long way from home
I've never been so lonesome and a long way from home
Never been so lonely.

 #23402  by gumbo
 
I dunno, I have a crew waiting for me when I do go, and place for me where I live now.I just dont see why I cant go to school later, its the same thing, just later. Please tell, this is making me think.