ok i cleaned up the shielding, and re-did some of the grounding.
I made a schematic of the wiring, but think i need to go at with some colored pencils, as all i had on hand was a sharpie. its a mess. I also think some of my solders onto the bare ground wire may be cold, and could cause some problems down the road, so I am going to re-do them this weekend with my soldering gun as that will be a lot quicker than with my 30 W iron. Another potential i thought of for a ground loop would be the brass plate connecting the two outputs. could this cause a loop?
i really should just shield this sucker.
for posterity, here's the drawing i did last night. it's a mess. Does anyone know a good free/cheap software I could use to draw it out?

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for the record, crackle is still there, and I noticed it is really only there when i run the pickups in series. parallel is fine as is north coil. I do have the pickup shields connected together, then running to ground. I am going to change that to connect the shield to the ground point on each pickup switch just to keep them apart until it hits ground.